KAHIHI

We all have heard about great people, the famous ones, the successful ones, and so on. And we have also known that the key contributor of their success and fame has been dedication, hard work, perseverance, obsession to achieve that something. We give a great thought to these things. We spend hours on discussing how these great people achieved it, what made them follow their dream with such equanimity while still having a bubbling fervor in their bellies.
However, seldom do we think that even can achieve what we desire.
And it is neither impossible nor difficult, if practiced religiously.
What we call dedication, focused approach, determination is actually an energy that we transmit through our thoughts and actions that in turn attract the things you desire. Read Paulo Coelho’s Alchemist or Rhonda Byrnes’ Secret or simply watch SRK’s Om Shanti Om where he says, “Agar kisi cheez ko dil se chaaho to poori kaynath usey tumse milane ki koshish main lag jaati hai.”
Rarely have I seen people approach a thing with positive intent.
I was once waiting for an auto near a school. It was exam time, perhaps. A group of young boys were discussing how the exam paper will be, “fadu nahi hona chahiye, apne ko answers yaad nahi aye toh,” utter nonsense, I thought. Their fear then transmigrated into viscous thoughts of how to cheat in the exam, making chits, showing answer papers by sitting in a particular manner. The nervousness was leaching in gradually, which evidently would have made their learning evaporate. Had all this time been utilized to discuss what they had studied or discussing that let the paper be of any level of difficulty we will crack it, the entire feeling would have been different, a positive feeling could have made them feel good and that feeling would have made handling the situation simpler.
I see husband and wife cribbing about finances, domestic issues, children etc. If that constant cribbing solves the problems, no worries, go ahead and suppurate as much as you want. However, it does not, sadly. It only makes life more miserable. It brings in more irritability and in certain cases even creates cracks in the relationships. Instead if you remain calm, always have a smile, and tackle things cheerfully, life indeed will become beautiful. It is no use wasting precious time in weeping about the things that bother you. As a substitute, utilize that time in working towards achieving things you desire, something that will bring contentment to your life be it material desires or at emotional or physical or spiritual.
Same is true with dissatisfied job, broken relationship, ill financial conditions, etc. etc.
We have always learnt from our school times that opposites attract, however, that is true in case of magnets and physics. But we are talking human dynamics here. We are not magnets. We are a powerhouse of intellect, emotions, comprehension.
We are different in a way that we can think, analyse, interpret, adjust, and communicate. Utilize all this to target and achieve things you desire. And pursue them all throughout. Only one single thought should run through you of what you want in life. Negativity, pessimism will only help in accumulating nuisance value which can be encashed only for heart attacks, blood pressure, stress, insomnia. Where following your dream with a strong focus will bring happiness, cheer, joy, respect, and success to you. You decide what you want. The choice lies with you, within you.
Right from the time of Mahabharata in which Arjun saw only the birds eye whereas all his other brothers saw trees, leaves, sky etc to the time when my father use to show me a small magic by burning a corner of a paper using a magnifying lens, the whole point is about focus. A strong focus makes you strong from within, confident, and powerful.
Focus on what you want and not on what you cannot. Be with likeminded people who share thoughts similar to yours, who desire similar things as you. At a subconscious level keep thinking about your aspirations and act on them at your conscious level. Keep your thought process going, keep envisaging yourself as if you are someone you wanted to be, you have everything that you wanted to have, the things, bring in some habitual changes.
Life is like a mirror. It will show you exactly what you put in front of it.
Happy Living!

Imagine how wonderful it will be to learn how people use their minds, their mental strategies, and act in a manner where the entire aura around everyone is filled with compassion and positive energies. It is truly an enticing experience to enrich the quality of other people’s lives. The enrichment is nothing but the change in one’s attitude and approach, necessarily in the positive direction. It leaves a magical effect on the people and also on the surroundings of those people.

Each one of us, at some point, have had felt a strong desire to bring about a change to this world, change in our surroundings, change in yourself or a person, all to make things better and have a conducive environment all around where things are un unison creating an overflow of pleasant positive things. This desire usually stems from vision, ‘our lives could be enriched and improved in some way’. Such visions provide guidance and directions for our lives and our work, furnishing the motivation and impetus for the change. Such visions when shared by number of people, form a foundation for effective team work and ultimately for progress of a civilization.

This process of change that causes human evolution, when accelerated with focused approach and objectives, give birth to revolutions. Chain of events takes place just like a rolling snowball from the top of a mountain that gathers more snow and momentum as it slides down. That small ball of stone eventually becomes mammoth like and unstoppable, engulfing anything and everything that comes in its way. These are the times when history is shaped.

Quite similarly, it is possible to bring about changes in us and revolutionise the way we behave, interact, communicate, and approach to situations, the only challenge being to take charge of the process and direct it with precision. With the changes taking place in small packets, you will one day find yourself gifted with a huge packet of solace and satisfaction. You will feel wonderful when you re-experience the most wonderful moments of life as it they are happening now, and you will become amnesiac to your problems, worries, frustrations, limitations.

The question is not whether you can be happy or successful. It is actually about how much happiness can you stand before you finally fall off? And realize this is just the beginning. There is a whole new world to be explored as saying says, “Anyone can count seeds in apple but no one can possibly count all the apples in the seed.”

My niece and I visited an amusement park last weekend. She had been after me since many weeks. Not able to further confront her frowning face, we packed our little bags with the essentials, and drove to the amusement park that had recently opened on the outskirts of the city. More than imagining about the fun we were going to have at the park, I was jollied with the enthusiasm my niece had in her. She was singing all the way, waving her little hands to the kids on the road side, licking the chocolate bar, crunching the potato chips et al.

We reached the destination as per our schedule. It was fun. Lots of joy rides, games, ice creams, and bites of sandwiches. At midday, we took little rest on the lush green lawn under a widely spread banyan tree. I noticed my niece had fixed her gaze on something else. Bright colourful balloons floating in the air had become her fancy. She had instantly fallen in love with the red, blue, yellow, pink, and white shades of the balloons. I bought her one of each colour. With strings of those balloons tightly clutched in her left hand and the right hand gripped in my left palm, she walked hopped all through the way till the parking area. We were heading back home.

My niece had become very possessive and protective of the balloons. She had tied them to a corner of her bed. She took a look at them at least ten times in a day. She kissed each colour once in her every visit. Worried that someone might steal them, she never took those balloons out to play with her friends. Yet she rushed back to her room often while in middle of the game to check if her balloons were in place. She use to go back with a smile. She was so much in love with them.

Eventually with each passing day, she noticed that the balloons were getting smaller and smaller. The smile on her face was making a reverse curve now. Finally one day, she found all her balloons have disappeared and only pieces of rubber remained. She cried a lot that day. She insisted that she wanted the old ones only. I had to surrender. Though it was too mature a statement for her tender age, I had to irrevocably explain to her that nothing is permanent, nothing lasts forever, and one day everything fades away and so on. My niece told me that she will buy new ones, if she wants to, when she grows up; till then she will just be happy about the moments of happiness she had had with those five balloons. In a span of one week or so, my niece had graduated from a series of emotions – happiness, obsession, insecurity, sadness, mournful, and finally maturity.

While returning from office that evening, crammed in the traffic jam, my words to my niece that afternoon resonated back to me. I could draw many analogies based on that, most principally about our interactions or relationships of our day-to-day life. I kept thinking to myself that every relationship in our life is like those little balloons spreading color and joy and making a difference to what we are.

Some relationships leave everlasting impressions in our lives and give us the strength to lead our life till the end with just the fond memories of those relationships. Like how those balloons introduced my niece to different shades of emotions, relationships too take you on a trail of feelings. At times, relationships give you a reason to experience fullness, make you feel stronger, guide us through the difficult times as support, strength and aid us physically, emotionally and perchance spiritually. Some relationships become an integral part of your existence.

Sometimes, we feel that a particular relationship and the things happened to us as they were like a God’s gift especially for us. They are in our lives for the reason we need them to be. They make an impact and difference to who we are.

Yet eventually, no matter how strongly we tend to hold on to it, the relationship hits a roadblock and everything turns into a void. Worst is the fact that sometimes relationships end for no fault of ours, like the balloons disappearing at their will for no fault of my little angel.

People simply walk away. Sometimes they force us to stand up and put a period to the relationship. The fancy of “my world ends at you” soon turns into a fallacy when the same person ends up everything, and you are left staring into the infinity about the next step. You stumble, your crawl, you drag yourself but the person had walked away, too far, too soon.

Relationships sporadically teach us something we have never done before. The mourning and the pain might lessen if we accept the fact that every act has a reason. All we can do is accept the reality, love, and cherish every moment spent. Though it may seem like the end of the world, in reality it is not. Just that it needs some courage. There can always be a new beginning. Though a particular relationship is irreplaceable, a new relationship may be on its way that will shower happiness and love on you all over. You need to welcome it smile, optimism, and little caution perhaps. Don’t shut yourself because something did not work earlier. Open your heart to new ones and embrace the beauty of life, the beauty exists because of every relationship. So let’s love and respect what we have while we still have it for it is certain that “Nothing Lasts Forever”, so before it exhausts live it to your fullest.

A leader, one who leads, as the word suggests, is supposed to be an icon, a confident example for the youth, and a strong shoulder for the old to rely on. Recently, one such man who personifies these qualities visited Mumbai, a city which is in dying need of a good leader and able administrator.

Barack Obama was in Mumbai. A man whom people have willingly elected as their President and given him the reigns of the most powerful office in the world. A man who when speaks has fullest of attention drawn to him, people listen without any hesitation and with pin drop silence interspersed with claps and applause. Back home, we have an equally mesmerising speaker-leader, who shares a similar stature and charm - Raj Thackeray.

Obama, a change America believed in and a change world saw. At his Hampshire speech, he upped the crowd frenzy with his words “change is what happening in America right now”. Every time he speaks, Obama seamlessly disseminates his energy to the crowd. And he does it the best. He conjures his vision of doing the best for America and that Americans deserve the best with the crowd that makes the entire environment zealous. That is what is needed in a speaker, a leader. And India lacks such a leader.

There are many leaders qualified to lead India, but we lack a man who shares his zeal, his love for India through his words, through his talks, and no doubt through actions.

There is one such marvellous speaker here in India, on the wrong path though, Raj Thackeray, whose objectives match that of Obama’s, of doing good for his men, however, his steps seem to have set off in the wrong direction. When he speaks, the crowd moves to his words, when he takes his patent pause the audience, all his nemesis miss their heartbeat.

“Yes We Can, three words that will ring from coast to coast and from sea to sea” and these three words did undoubtedly create a new chapter in history not only in America but in the whole world. He motivated people for a change through his words, through his speeches. And when he recently visited Mumbai, his interaction with the youth at St. Xavier’s College was inspiring for us young Indians to bring into politics a leader like him. The dialogue he held with the students, his tact of answering them – taking a pause, pondering over the question, composing an apt answer – show the great orator inside him.

One lucky student who got a chance to ask him a question, remarked, “Sir, someday I wish to be half as good as an orator you are”.

This reaction piteously exposes the dearth of good orators we have in our politics. And the handfuls that we have lack the charisma of holding people together merely by use of effective words. Some speak with accents we can’t understand, some way too loud and some like they are sharing a secret with the microphone. India needs charismatic leaders, who hold the public to their every word, who make people stand at their speeches without hesitation, who inspire the youth, who charge them up, and so on. Raj Thackeray fits into this description of orators. It is simply impossible to ignore him, though you may hear a lot of his hateful-stories. Allies or opposition people take notice of him, he makes them listen and everybody appreciates his oratory, though a few do so cowardly.

At St. Xavier’s, Obama gripped those present, with his alluring style, presenting the youth with three questions to answer and making us want for some more. One of his best answers was about whether material wealth, in very crisp words he just said, “Never preach an empty stomach”. He even remarked that he fell short of examples when making references to people like Gandhi and Dr. King. This shows his humbleness. This is something that Raj may have to work on; a little essence of humanity added to his words will make sampoorna Mumbai fall at his feet. Obama left an impression upon us youth that will last forever and a path that will be walked upon.

Politicians, in my generation, will not commit the mistakes of the older generation, but our own mistakes, in the President’s words. This grappling effect of the youth leaders will certainly make new icons among this generation that will fill in the gap that Indian politics and society desperately need. Raj and Obama can be our “Adarsh” to bring about the change that we have been waiting for long, way too long!

Octopus Paul is dead. Probably, world is mourning; Spain certainly; India too. For India is very sentimental about such topics – astrology, predictions, fortune telling; so what if it was an octopus this time and not a roadside jyotishi sitting with a parrot. Indians, by and large, balance well between getting emotional and credulous; hoping sides as per the convenience.

Had Paul not breathed his last on 26th Oct, we could have imported him to predict the Bihar elections and the subsequent KDMC one. At least Paul could have saved us from the pique of “Tu-Tu-Main-Main” sponsored by the Thackeray Bros. The animal could have, to some extent, lessened the cat-and-dog like fight.
  
It would have been a great sigh of relief for them, us, and the media channels to have known whether it was “Uddhav’s Rajkaran” or “Raj Uddhavast” that would ultimately triumph. It then doesn’t matter what the end result it but we love to hallucinate in the galore of predictions and forecast.

Though we tried to sideline Paul claiming it is something we have been practising since ages, with a parrot though, somewhere deep within we all believed in the octopus theory.

Any social gathering or a group in college or residents of an apartment, anywhere once it is revealed that someone can read a palm or forehead, people start flocking to that person rubbing their palm hard on the bum or wiping their forehead with the forearm, to know about their future. Such is the craze.

Once at a wedding, I came across a person who could read palm of the foot. I wasn’t surprised. It is quite possible. Girls, with ghagra pulled up to the knee level, were dying to show him their feet. He was closely looking at the foot of short dark boy and proclaimed, ‘a fortune awaits this boy in next 3 years, and he is going to be a rich man with a business of his own’. The boy was actually a helper of a caterer there at the wedding. It is more than 8 years now, the by hasn’t made any fortune, he still works under the Marwadi caterer businessman. I haven’t seen that foot-palm reader ever since, fortunately for him.

 Our muse with getting predictions for the happenings in our life is abysmal. I usually don’t understand why people are so desperate to kill the thrill of their life.

Cricket channels too had started getting such fortune teller guests to predict the result of the match. The guests did all sorts of things with cards, numbers, stars etc, and gave some statistics. However, in the end, they do mention that the best team will ultimately win. Where is the fortune-teller’s skill then? Even I can make a statement like that.

Bejan Daruwala predicts the movement of the stock market. A reputed entity like CNBC and www.moneycontol.com believe more in what “Ganesha Says...” than what Gujral, Bhansali, Tulsian, etc say. Both the groups are useless anyways.

Channels make money for they know how to tap the emotional turbulence of Indians. We love getting exploited without applying even an iota of rationale to what we hear, see, and do.

Another instance where we love getting manipulated is “Vastu” and “Feng Shui”. Just because some Feng Shui consultant tells us to illuminate our home with bright red things, we buy all sorts of lustrous red that we can get and keep hoping that some great fortune will come kissing us. Feng Shui came from China. The climate there is extremely cold. In the colour wheel, red and yellow are considered to be warm colours, they depict warmth, heat. This is the reason why mostly in Chinese houses you will find abundant use of red and yellow; to possibly neutralise the effect of the cold climate. However, this may not be applicable in India. We already have a warm tropical climate, especially in Mumbai where humidity is so high.

But we are blinded by the sweet words of the astrologers, Feng Shui consultants, numerologists, and so on. By chance, if you make a fortune at all one day, it will be purely because of the hard work and dedication you put in.

Till then you may only dream to accumulate fortune, while your Feng Shui consultant and astrologer is collecting it by the way of hefty fees charged to you.

- P. K. Dastoor

I met Pratyush today. During our school days, Pratyush and I had acted in a drama called ‘Alladin Ka Chirag’. I was Alladin and because of his chubby bulky stature, Pratyush suited to be a Jinee. Since then, Pratyush always used to fantasize about the story and dreamt of getting all world pleasures. He used to try and rub every lamp or lamp like structure that he came across. His obsession grew to such an extent that he always used to walk alongside the guttars, nalas, garbage boxes and so on, just with a hope that he would find a lamp someday and that lamp would produce a Jinee, when rubbed. He changed his school and eventually we lost contact. I have no idea whether his quest for that lamp was still on.

When I met him today (We got in touch with each other through some alumni site and then planned to meet), nothing much had changed - same bulky physique, searching eyes and noisy presence. To my surprise, even today he hunts for a lamp and jokes about it – ‘Never lose hope’. However, the desperation had reduced to a significant extent. We got nostalgic about the drama and how we read a lot of Alladin stuff collected from books, teachers, grandparents and so on (good that Internet was a distant reality then). We laughed thinking of the times when Pratyush would walk near the garbage boxes. I used to tease him – ‘Tu bada hokey bhangaarwala banega (You will be a rag picker when you grow up)’.

While coming back home I kept thinking about Pratyush and his search for lamp. Some random flashed across my mind and realized that there are lot of Jinnies around you, only if you comprehend it properly. People around you give you a lot, possibly all the pleasures and happiness that you could have ever thought of. At least, I have been lucky to find such real life Jinnies who have cherished my life and made it a wonderful experience. My family, wife, friends, teachers, colleagues all at some point in time have helped me walk through some memorable moments of satisfaction and pleasure. Everything else that a Jinee from the lamp could offer seems very materialistic. At end of the day, I feel happier recounting the number of smiles I have had, than the gold, wealth, riches that a Jinee could have offered – and all this without rubbing a lamp.

If only Pratyush could realize that Jinnies are all around, he does not need a lamp (which he may never find) to rub his hands on, but just needs to open his eyes.